Push Me, Baby

This week end was decent on the food (and lack there of) scale. But now it's time to get back to hardcore weight loss. I am going to cut an apple into quarters every morning, and eat 1/4 of it every 2 hours. By the time that I get home in the afternoon I will be done with the apple and I will have spaced out the food so as to keep my metabolism up. (Thanks to TenderSlim for the advice). I will eat this apple and, when my mom forces me to eat with her, the smallest portion of dinner possible, and that's it. For the entire week. I am joining a new gym tonight. I plan on going 4 days a week plus treadmilling it every day I don't go to the gym for at least 2.5 miles. And of course the usual yoga and 75 crunches. This. Had. Better. Work. Dammit!

PS- I decided I'm going to weigh myself tomorrow when I get home and then I will weigh myself at the end of this "apple" fast, after 7 days of hard work. Who knows, maybe I'll extend it another week if I show true progress. Wish me luck!

(ffffound, mirandakerronline, supermodels.nl, style.com)

Stay strong & carry on,

Belle

Day Four?!

Okay this is seriously unfair. I was nearly perfect yesterday and today I still weigh the EXACT SAME... 144.4. I might as well paint black spots all over my fat ass and start moo-ing. This calls for a fast. But the week ends are always hard to fast on for me since my mom forces me to eat with her for at least 1-2 meals per day. So I'm thinking I will keep my caloric intake as low as possible and I will do a 3-5 day fast starting monday. Just you watch, I'm going to hurdle this road block like a professional track star. Nothing can stop me from losing weight!

Today: all five stars met

Model Thinspiration: Gisele Bundchen

(people.com, google)

Stay strong & carry on,

Belle

Who Says Words Can't Change Your World?

I've decided we need more thinspirational quotes on this blog. You know, friendly reminders that we're not alone, that we have willpower, that we are already beautiful and that we can succeed in the journey to become exponentially more beautiful...

 

Reminders that no matter how many bad days, no matter how many binges, how many mistakes we may make on the journey, we can always return to the journey and its clarity; that while the crunches ache and the runs burn, our lungs sting and our hearts hurt, we have the power to overcome... to become.

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." - Confucius

(weheartit, perfect thinspiration, knight cat)

Remember to love yourselves, ladies.

You are indescribably precious and unique.

You can hate your body but love your soul.

Stay strong and carry on,

Belle

Day Three?

I feel like I'm making no progress here. The scale still says 144. Even though I have been eating under 500 cal, exercising 250 cal, and drinking 7-8 glasses of water a day for the past three days I have only lost 1-1.5 lbs. What the hell?! Maybe it's my lack of sleep. Whatever it is, it better remove itself from blocking my weight loss and help me start shedding pounds. I have determined if I weigh the same damn weight tomorrow (or MORE somehow?!), I am going to try a 3 day fast to see if it won't break whatever weight block my body feels it needs right now. Agh. Just so frustrating.

All five stars met today. Intake: 1 bowl of homemade spicy thai soup (w/o the noodles) (200 cal)

 a handful of raisins (50 cal)

a cup of yoghurt (100 cal)

Total: 350

(ffffound, ru_glamour, fmd1, google, thinspo for life)

(lyrics by Mae)

Stay strong & carry on,

Belle

Day Two

Yesterday I completed all 5 stars. Today here's what I've had (I always overestimate calorie content):

-1/3 banana (60 cal)

-4 mini shnyder's pretzels (40 cal)

-1 fiber bar (120 cal)

-1 small serving of plain pasta (200 cal)

Total intake: 420 cal (damn can you say carbssss?!)

Exercise: noneee yet, I overslept a few hours while trying to take a 20 min nap grr

Weigh in: 144 lbs

But even if I don't meet all five stars today, I will make at least 4. And tomorrow I will cut 250 calories out to make up for whatever star I didn't get to today. I so needed the sleep.

Here's some lovely thinspo for you all! Thanks for following everybody!

(supermodels.nl, skinnygossip, ffffound, perfect thinspiration, ru_glamour, flickr)

Stay strong & carry on,

Belle

Day One

It felt so good not to eat today... up until this afternoon when I had a small apple and a half an english muffin. But I made my first star of the day and exercised 264 cal. As always, I will have to eat dinner since I still live with my rents. But not for much longer. School starts in August so I don't have that much longer that I have to satisfy their watchful eyes. But I am confident that I can make the second star and keep intake below 500 for sure. Today's weigh in: 144.6 lbs (damn I'm huge, I know). SGW: 140 by friday. Stay thinspired everyone!

(ffffound)

Stay strong & carry on,

Belle

Back... In Full Throttle

It's been almost a month since my last post. And all I have to say for it is... I'm sorry. I have gone through a really tough break up, a few break downs, a near hospitalization, and the consequent general loneliness and depression. I have lost most of my friends and I have gained back every last pound that I had lost (I had gotten down to 123!). What a sucky March and start of April. And in the midst of all of this shit, I turned 18. Yay? Yea, I guess it's "happy birthday, you weigh a whale and a half." But all of this ends now. 

I am back and ready to do this for the umpteenth time. I will get down AND STAY THERE. I have a new internist (internal doctor) that is really great. And I mean really. She understands my condition (minus the ED of course... I mean she IS a doctor after all) and where I stand. It's probably a good thing that I didn't go in when I was at my low weight, she would've caught on. She had me get some blood work done to see if I am anemic and to see if I have a thyroid problem since I am always tired. She's also going to put me on an antidepressant (preferably Prozac since you can lose weight with it) that doesn't interfere with my ADD meds and I started a BC pill a few weeks ago that has made my boobs bigger (which is really neither here nor there if they disappear once I get back to my low weight). But over all, things are finally looking up. I am going to be happier, have more energy, and finally get back on track.

So here's my plan. I'm going to call it the Five Star Plan.

Every day I must meet all five stars before I go to bed. Which are...

1) eat less than 500 cal total (record all food eaten as usual, but this time I will be posting it on here as well)

2) exercise for at least 250 cal

3) drink at least 8 glasses of water

4) complete AT LEAST 50 crunches

5) record weigh in at the same time every afternoon and directly after, post thinspo and my daily stats on here!

I must lose this fat. I will be thin. I will do this. I hope all of you are doing well, reaching goals, and getting positively skinny! I missed you guys. And thanks so much Eliena for your friendly and encouraging comment! It meant so much during the month or so to know that I had support and a friendly voice if I should've needed it.

(supermodels.nl, weheartit, ffffound, ???)

Stay strong & carry on,

Belle